Twas the Night Before Christmas
Enjoy this adapted holiday poem, originally shared in 2012!
Twas the month of Christmas, when all on the floors
Every child was spilling, which adds to the chores
The dinner was rushed, as my wife gave a cheer,
”Eat it with joy, it may be the last of the year!”
The children sneak candy up into their beds
While stickiness and crumbs cover the bedspreads
And Mama doing laundry, thinking “I JUST cleaned that!”
Went to get the vacuum, fighting a domestic combat
When out in the drive there arose such a clatter
I yelled from my chair, “kids, see what’s the matter!”
No one went, not one reply
So I guess I’ll get up, and I do with a sigh
The fella in maroon on the steps of my stoop
Gave the greeting of someone who knows the scoop
”When did she call? I know why you’re here.”
Sooner Cleaning has arrived, our stains will soon disappear
With a tour of the house and some clutter ditched quick
My wife’s in no mood for chatting or shtick
More rapid than eagles, his hoses they came
And he pushed, and he pulled – no shame in his game!
"Now dining! Now bath! Now closet and bedroom!
On, kitchen! On, master! On, living and sunroom!
To the top of the sofa! To the top of chair!
Now spots away! Spots away! And done with flare!”
My in-laws arrive, early the next week
And compliment our home, with no tongue in cheek
The carpets look so good, it surely is true
I have experienced the wonder of your SC+R crew
And then in my mind, I hear a nice voice
Sooner Cleaning has caused me to again rejoice
My wife appears to have everything intact
So back to my chair for a long winters nap!
******
My oldest is yelling, what could be the matter?
As I awake from my chair, I feel a slight splatter
Water is dripping right onto my head
And now I am filled with all kinds of dread
I run up the stairs, I already feel wary!
My youngest in the bath has done something scary!
His water has run and run but not slow
And now I can see this is no mere overflow
As I slosh on the carpet with wet socks and feet
My wife’s back from shopping but how will I greet?
And then I remember my cool carpet guy
Said Sooner Cleaning restores, and boy do we fly!
I find the number and make the call in haste
Evelyn answers and agrees, “there’s no time to waste!”
The house won’t be destroyed – not on my watch
The water is flowing, but not like good Scotch
Evelyn said, “don’t worry, I know it’s past eight
But we won’t leave you hanging, you won’t have to wait.
The on-call tech arrives and better I soon feel
We will be dry shortly and barely recall this ordeal
Sooner Cleaning has saved our bacon again
And Jim Mitchell is surely a ten out of ten
I heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight,
"No emergencies too late even on Christmas night!"